It hit me. It finally did. It hit me why I was so obsessed with Carousels.
Of course, there is the playfulness. The carnivals liveliness. The color. The lights. The glistening eyes. The kids excitement.
I’ve been searching for a metaphor to my life. Trying to explain it all to my own self. Attempting to make sense of it all to my inner child.
Is it a sea? Nah too vast. Too deep.
A roller coaster? Nah too rigid.
A storm? Nah too stormy (You did know the real definition to the word before naming your child that Kylie, right? ok. just needed to get that out of the way)
This past week, while watching the rhythm of the Merry go round- making sure to wave EVERY SINGLE TIME the kids passed, as per mom code- it hit me.
MY LIFE'S A CAROUSEL.
So so many downs
Equally as many UPS!
It’s been a long dark winter of me – many times focusing on the lows and the noise. But now, if I watch the rhythm closely, I can recognize the ups too and that noise? That’s actually music!
As you have seen, I have slowed down immensely in the Event Design dept. as I’ve had to give myself just a little bit of extra love and care. In addition to that, I have been stressing out trying to fit into a mold that I've set up for myself. I've forced myself to fit into being a 'certain type' of Event designer. Consequentially, I've been trying to find a niche and had a hard time deciding what Niche I would like to focus on most and what to drop and actually realized that I don’t have a niche.
I have many niches and that's my niche.
I’m currently reworking what my contribution to this worldly space is/or should be and how I can make it work. For the time being I will continue to focus on Lifestyle content creation as well as the occasional ‘Party In A Box’ debut be”h.
So here I am, attempting to make sense of it all while being grateful for the many blessings in my life including- Although at times confusing- my will for constant change and growth.
BRB I’ve got work to do.
Thank you for being patient with me.
Xo - Gitty